It was time.

I knew I had to say goodbye..for my own sanity..to the past, farewell.

I wrote a simple goodbye to my religious past and its community. I’m the only one who knows what it said. I folded it up into an origami heart and took it to the Samhain celebration on Sunday.

The words spoken at this Druid ritual really fed my soul. This time of year is a time of change and preparation for the dark winter ahead..like the time a caterpillar is in its cocoon…to rest and allow the change to take place.

It was time for me to say goodbye and I placed my letter in the fire as a symbol of purification and closure for what had plagued me for so long. I’m thankful for the good I learned along the way, for even in a religious abusive environment, Jesus still speaks, comforts, and guides. He still taught me what I needed to know for the time.

In my heart I sang a song..to the tune of an old youth camp song…

Religion behind me, my faith before me,

Religion behind me, my faith before me,

Religion behind me, my faith before me,

No turning back, no turning back.

Tears streamed down my cheeks.

It’s time to stop looking at the yesterdays and turn to face forward…in the direction that my ship is headed.

I take a deep breath and dust the dirt from my feet and celebrate with a communal drink  of apple juice with my friends.

A smile emerges on my face.

Goodbyes are never easy, but hellos are so joyous.

And today we’re packing….it’s a step of faith.