An Ageless Hope

January 21, 2012 By Leave a Comment

There has been a continual debate about Pluralism, Inclusiveness, and Exclusivity among a variety of religions. These concepts seem to be found in several cultures and religions therefore are not argued exclusively among Christian camps. I will be using some terms in this article to explore a larger hope and I ask that you work hard to see the concept I am sharing in terms of how I am re-defining common words used in many religions.

I will be using the word ‘religion’ with the definition of  ’tangible ways in which we carry out traditions in our acts of worship’. It is commonly taught that these tangible traditions are a path to a person’s salvation. However in this perspective I present today, ‘religion’ is not the “road to Salvation”. I think this definition I share of “religion” is the outward manifestation of what is already taking place in the heart…Salvation is what is happening within.

I believe that whoever we consider the Creator/Deity/Divine etc can and does work that salvation within us in a spiritual way that best fits who we are and how we come upon the revelation of such salvation. Expounding upon that thought, I wish to emphasize that our Creator meets us “where we are” and “as we are”. If our Creator decides to use metaphors from childhood fables, Hollywood sci-fi, Science, or religious texts is up to that Creator. It doesn’t mean only one of these avenues is “the only road to salvation” for all people.

I believe that being a “Christian” is a mix of cultural and theological components gleaning from the bible as their text. Other religions follow a similar concept..cultural and theological components gleaning from their spiritual texts. I will use the terms ‘Theos’ and ‘Creator’ interchangeably as a non gender spiritual being outside of and yet within our realm of existence. For the sake of keeping Theos as a relatable being to us, I use ‘him’  as a non gender term as opposed to ‘it’ which seems to break the relational aspect off from us.

What we call Theos , just may be using all kinds of avenues to get his message across… reconciliation to our Creator. It is debatable on whether or not human-kind was ever broke off from Theos or if we were simply deceived into thinking we were. I will not get into that argument here. The angle I introduce today is that of a concept of universal reconciliation. This angle is what I believe to be the foundation of all that is going on between human-kind and Theos. So in this perspective, there is no such thing as “all religions lead to god” but rather.. Theos uses any means necessary to speak the evangel( good news of reconciliation) to his creation. The people Theos speaks to in all different cultures and paths will understandably follow a unique path based on their cultural and theological communities and with whatever spiritual texts have been handed down through their generations.

If we look at this relationship between Theos and human-kind, we can see how each culture of people have found a variety of ways to come to know this Theos, how to express their path of understanding, and what that looks like for each individual(and as groups) is manifested in diverse ways.

It may very well be that Theos wants each culture of peoples to follow in a traditional pattern. Christians, Hindus, Muslims, Pagans, etc have cultures that embody such traditional patterns that are unique to their people. It is entirely possible that Theos does not want Christians to weave their beliefs and traditions in with Muslims, nor Pagans with Jews. It is evident that each religions seem to hold to a varying degree of belief about that. Maybe instead of arguing over this, we might come to respect that this might be the way in which Theos has planned out humanity to be among one another. It could be that Theos wants us to learn about each path and find ways in which to live in harmony among one another while respecting our differences and celebrating our similarities. Whatever the case may be, each individual needs to decide for themselves what traditional teaching they believe Theos wants them to participate in.

This is not pluralism, inclusiveness, nor exclusiveness, but I do believe it is the basic foundation where all three perspectives grow from. I believe that many from human-kind has done their best to navigate their lives and carry on the heritage of their tribes the best they knew how. Sadly, this has manifested many religious and political wars over the ages in their quest for freedom to continue their spiritual paths.

There is another perspective on the word ‘salvation’ that is not the same as the cosmic reconciliation of human-kind to Theos, but can be viewed as an extension of it. This ‘salvation’ I am referring to is obtained through understanding truth that leads to clarity and healthy decision making. These healthy decisions grow the metaphorical fruit that is pleasant to the growth of our spiritual lives as well as nourishing to our human relationships. This kind of fruit grows from the tree of life which is deeply rooted within us all and is drinking from the living water that is an ongoing wellspring coming from within that cosmic spiritual revelation of our reconciliation and the larger hope for the reconciliation of all to Theos.

Some may never have this reconciliation journey for themselves in this life, but this larger hope is that Theos has a way of bringing all things and people into his balance, in whatever way is best for all.

This perspective is not a religion, just a neutral perspective on what just may be the greatest hope for all mankind. It is inclusive to all, yet exclusively experienced by those who have been awakened. In this belief, Theos sends his messengers to us in a variety of ways and people need to be free to listen and follow Theos as he guides them. He may or may not guide them to follow one path for a time then divert them to another path. That is between them and Theos.

The tradition I have been following is by respecting one another’s paths while extending the invitation to learn the evangel from our/your perspective, but remain humble and not insistent on our/your way being a better or a ‘more right’ way. In all of this the philosophy of the ‘golden rule’ holds true in all paths and has proven to be a healthy way in which to find peace among each other.

I don’t know if a term already exists for this perspective, and I hesitate on coining a term for it out of the concern for it becoming misrepresented or hijacked by another insistent religion that wants to own it or change it. I dislike the ideas of labels that box people up. All I can say is that I call it an Ageless Hope that is inclusive to all, yet exclusive to those experiencing it. It may very well be witnessed at the roots of various beliefs since the beginning of time. All are invited to this evangel and may observe it and participate in it.

In upcoming articles I will share how I have come to live my life within this perspective. In my opinion, there is no reason to leave the traditions you already observe in order to participate in the celebration of life among your fellow humans who do embrace this perspective. They might be within your existing churches, PTA meetings, clubs, frats or various other circles of friends and loved ones. Many fear confessing to this Ageless Hope out of fear of disassociation from their groups. Those of us who do embrace this perspective do not require that you convert or give up anything in your life to celebrate with us. Everyone is free to celebrate and even create their own ‘tangible ways in which you carry out traditions in your acts of worship’. Bless you.

crashing tide by sisterlisa, on Pix-O-Sphere

Sisterlisa

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Orthodoxy or Tradtionalist

January 12, 2012 By Leave a Comment

After I placed my faith in Christ, I began learning of the perspectives of those Christians I was in fellowship with. It wasn’t until many years later that I even learned the word, Orthodoxy. I was told by the leaders in that group that Orthodoxy is what our authority was. It was described to me as the basis for having faith in Christ. It was the essentials to being a Christian. Over the years I have come to see a different perspective and thus was labeled a heretic, in other words, I was accused of being a false teacher. Some have taken what was supposed to be the non essentials and made them into essentials. There’s always going to be a varied response to that and yet I find myself wondering…where is the grace in all this?

cross by lady_jess, on Pix-O-Sphere

When Christ presented himself to me, he did not hand me a list of “essentials”, he simply embraced me in love…. everything else I learned came later. Something he has been discipled me in over the last few years is humility. It would be an incredible oxymoron to get a degree in humility as it is something that we humans can not achieve mastery in. However, my fellow minister, Monica Barden, pointed out that we can have degrees OF humility. Which means, we grow in humility and may find ourselves in different degrees of it. I’m not sure we can arrogantly claim to have a deeper degree in humility over another, for in the day we attempt to do so we may find ourselves so full of pride and totally blind by the beam in our eyes. I do think we can recognize when someone else’s humility surpasses our own though. We certainly can recognize that Christ is truly the most humble of us all.

Now lets get back to this idea of Orthodoxy. Orthodoxy is a word that many have come to accept as “right belief”. Within this realm are many beliefs in which they claim you must believe in, in order to be a “real Christian”. I have come to wrestle with this term Orthodoxy because it leads me to see pride involved. In the Orthodox view, the followers claim to be right and thus everyone else is wrong. This calls to my attention an argument of superiority and a serious problem with seeking to be a humble Christ follower.

Anyone who puts their faith in Christ becomes a Christ follower. Hence, they become a Christian. To attempt to disqualify someone as a Christian based on a set of beliefs creates a whole different realm of man led authority. When a person chooses to put their faith in Christ, that is all it takes to become a Christian. Everything else after that is theological study. Our academic education of all the diverse perspectives on the bible has nothing to do with our initial decisions to follow Christ.

I challenge the word and basis for Orthodoxy as an authority over who is Christian and who is not. I believe a better word for this group of people would be ‘Traditional’. The group that has followed their same old perspective of the Bible are Traditionalists. If they want to describe themselves as Orthodoxy then that is their freedom, however just because they claim to be Orthodoxy doesn’t mean they are. It also doesn’t mean they have authority to dictate to anyone else who is a Christian and who isn’t all based on their traditional views.

I am not against Christians who follow in their traditions, I’m just leery of them assuming authority over who is and is not a Christian. We are free in Christ and can follow him as HE guides us. When you place your faith in Christ, you then become a Christian. Everything else in your journey after that is called discipleship. So don’t worry yourself about what an “orthodoxy” group says to you about your journey in Christ. They are simply following an old traditional view and that is their freedom, they just do not have the authority to reject you from calling yourself a Christian.

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You’re Invited

December 27, 2011 By 2 Comments

The year 2011 was quite a journey for me as a whole, but specifically as a Christ follower. I walked away from the hell-trend in modern Christianity and sought to follow my Lord in a more organic path without the threat of eternal torture. This has brought on a lot of criticism and at the same time a lot of genuine inquiry of my spiritual journey. In order for me to continue to follow Christ, I had to cease from viewing God as an emotional and insecure manipulator. According to evangelical fundamentalism, I already believe in Jesus and in his atonement for my sin, therefore a literal fire torture hell is no longer a threat to my soul and as such I found that living a life of victory was in order. So, believing in a literal hell made no difference to my Kingdom life as a Christian. I didn’t choose to follow Christ because of such a hell in the first place. So why would it matter to me now?

Many would say because I have an obligation now to tell other people about that place of never ending torture. Pardon me while I speak (write) so boldly as I declare that there are real life dangers, scams, and hells on earth to assist people with as it is, NOW! Those people have a difficult time imagining an afterlife of torture when they’re already living a torturous life as it is. I also found that using hell as a threat to ‘choose Jesus or else’ shaped a very dysfunctional relationship with God and Jesus that was not yielding the peaceable fruit of the Spirit within. For those who believe in this fiery torment, you may be relieved that you won’t be tortured, but it doesn’t alleviate the tension you feel over your loved ones eternal destiny in unending flames.

I don’t believe that God ever intended to put the weight of your family’s sin on your shoulders when Jesus already bore that burden on our behalf. So what’s the point in evangelism then? Why preach the kingdom if there is no eternal fire chamber that people dangle over by a thread? Is that all Jesus is good for? The get out of hell card? Or is there more to Jesus and this Kingdom Life that goes largely unnoticed by much of Christendom today?

With over 35,000 denominations of Christianity today, you can bet that none of them have all the answers to everything nor does any one in particular hold “the right” interpretation on every point in the bible. We listen to the pastors and famous theologians of yesteryear to determine what to place our beliefs in. Everything we believe as Christians is done so by faith…without evidence.  Yet, we know to test everything by the Spirit and in doing so I look for the fruit.

Nevertheless, I continue to walk by faith in Christ by the experience I have come to attain in this evidence-less journey. No matter what interpretation a person chooses to follow, they do so by faith. When it all boils down and we come up against brick walls within Christianity, I rest in grace. Grace is such a paradoxical way to live and often times is widely criticized by many. What grace looks like to God is many times not agreed with by mankind. Why should sinners get a break when religious people live by such high standards? How is it that those sinners can get away with riotous living while the religious work so tirelessly to perform feats of perfection for God?

Shall we be like Baal’s priests in the Old Testament who cut themselves to get the attention of their god? Or can we boldly go before the throne of God because Jesus already showed us the way? Do we have to abstain from certain things to be good representations of our God or can we do whatever we want?

Can we love the beaten man on the road like the Samaritan did or are we to ignore the poor and refuse to get dirty in the sin of the world? What about the gays, pagans, or Christians who have been divorced? Are we to ‘put them away’ in a ‘writing of divorcement’ from fellowship due to the hardness of our hearts or can we take the high road and extend grace and love to them?

These are all very important questions and I invite you to join me in 2012 as I share with you how I came to find a balance in this Kingdom Life. I will share with you how important I believe it is to become a part of the solution to finding peace in our communities instead of dividing and creating wars among ourselves. I hope that my input in 2012 can be a positive contribution to the ongoing discussion on living a life in Christ based on faith, but in no way do I intend to produce a new format for living the Christian life. I don’t believe that my path is going to be the final formula of success that everyone needs a carbon copy of. I don’t want to be the next guru who is trying to convince you that I have all the answers, nor do I want anyone to put me on a pedestal. I’m just a person on a journey and I invite you to be a fellow traveler with me.

Filed Under: Grace, Organic Faith Tagged With: , , , ,

Accusations of Being Bitter or Negative?

November 21, 2011 By 2 Comments

When your heart has been broken and your trust betrayed, speaking up is not always viewed as needful, in fact it can sometimes be viewed as negative and with a bitter or critical tone. Sometimes just speaking up about our own weaknesses can bring on criticism.

This is one of the most damaging things we can say to each other.

Lets stop trying to run over and hide a persons’ wounds and words that come from their brokenness.

Stop and listen.

We’re not all going to always be understood the first time we say something. Our blog posts, Tweets, and Facebook statuses can be easily misunderstood. What feels like a healing post for some, might be viewed as a knock on another.

A 140 character Tweet is a tricky sort of communication. Send out a bland tweet and it gets ignored, give it an eye catching phrase and you could get a negative reaction, or a positive one…it all depends on the person reading it.

And when people gush out of their brokenness it’s not always going to look flattering.

This is where we get to live in the moment where grace is needed.

When we open discussions that trigger deep pain and comments burst forth with emotion…don’t whack people over the head with accusations of rebellion or bitterness. They’re broken and they trusted their audience with their transparency and where are the ministers of grace?

We claim to be followers of grace, but the moment it’s needed we foul it all up with strapping down people with verbal duct tape. We accuse people of having a negative tone and the audience might take the lead from the one trying to hush them.

And it’s more difficult when all of this happens in a community of friends.

If we blog from our brokenness, then we’re going to see people start opening up about their own pain and that’s where healing can begin…but not when they see others hushed or rebuked. That just clogs the arteries to the heart that needs healing.

We can’t holler at people who are bleeding. “Stop bleeding, you’re making a mess around here!“

I thought this community was a spiritual hospital. Do we want to see the wounded take their injuries to another community?

A Christian community is supposed to be for healing..that means broken people are going bleed in your presence and sometimes their injuries are inflicted by people within that community.

There’s no time for playing the blame game, injured people need grace.

If injured people can’t trust us with their wounds, then don’t be surprised when they leave the community all together and go elsewhere and for God’s sake don’t rebuke them for leaving. Would you keep going back to a hospital that kept pushing you out of the waiting room?

And if this post ruffles your feathers, it’s probably because there some truth in what I’m saying. None of us like to have our toes stepped on, but I think it’s high time we face the fact that our Christian community is dysfunctional.

When people talk about the pain they’ve experienced in the Christian community then rush to their side and give them some compassion. How dare we think our community is picture perfect all the time. Stop trying to defend a community as if it’s perfect. We’re not a perfect community and we can’t hide our faults. We’re a bunch of human beings who fall flat on our faces on a regular basis.

We have believers who haven’t grown in the 40+ years they’ve claimed to be a Christian while others who are new to this community have more wisdom and compassion in their little fingers.

Are we growing cold, withering on the vine, and refusing grace to one another?

When we say we’ve been hurt in the Christian community, we’re gasping for air so we can survive.

It’s ok to tell someone you see it happening. It’s ok to validate their pain. Because I will tell you this my friends..a person seeking healing is far more important than the reputation of your organizations.

How dare we bolster ourselves to protect the image of a business/ministry entity over consoling a person who was wounded there.

And while there are plenty of people going through a mass exodus from Christianity, I am not going to ditch my community and let the pushing, arguing, and indifferent people take over. I’m standing my ground and saying, enough is enough! I’ll stand in the fray with the wounded and lick their wounds for them if I have to. But don’t you dare push them out and try to cover their brokenness, because you’re embarrassed or more concerned about your own images.

People aren’t leaving Christianity because the world is enticing…they’re leaving because it’s a battle ground. I’m looking for people who will stand with me and help the wounded.

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Some Thoughts on Christian Universalism

November 16, 2011 By 2 Comments

Many times people who first come to study about Christian Universalism come from various church backgrounds and are mixing different interpretations and denominational theology together. So if you ask someone about Christian Universalism, you may get totally different perspectives from people.

There is a lot of misunderstanding about Christian Universalism and many times people automatically assume that all Universalists are in the same theological camp, but they are not. There is quite a bit of difference actually.

This is just my overview perspective of Christian Universalism, as I see it, within my own spiritual path. A Christian Universalist believes in the original Apostle’s creed. The belief of the abode of the dead has various interpretations, but the CU perspective is that this place in the Hebrew (sheol), and in the Greek (hades) is simply ‘the grave’. This is where Jesus descended to when he died, which is the same place everyone else goes when they die.

A Christian Universalist view is not a denomination per se, so you will rarely find a specific creed that they all unite under. The concept of the Royal Priesthood is taken seriously as our freedom to hear from the Holy Spirit directly and be our own judge of what to believe with grace as the foundation in our faith in Christ. This means we have the grace of Christ to search, question, and explore the scriptures and yield to the Spirit in areas that bring forth the fruit of the Spirit. As far as I can tell, most Christians believe in the Royal Priesthood, yet forget that they don’t need their pastor to be their mediator. But nonetheless, we believe in our spiritual equality among one another.

The term ‘universalist’ for a Christian Universalist does not mean everyone gets into the Kingdom no matter what their religion. But let me first explain that not all Christian Universalists adhere to a belief in the after life, yet we do all understand that the Kingdom is here and now..within us. This Kingdom we have now, is a place in which a believer in Christ has come into through grace. You see, a Christian can claim to follow Christ, but if they continue to live as if they need to obey the Law in order to enter the Kingdom then they have not yet understood this Kingdom. They might be ‘looking over the gate’ at the Kingdom, but walking freely within it is 100% by grace alone. It’s a spiritual concept and so long as a person is looking at the Kingdom as if it’s a literal plane of existence that will magically come down out of the clouds then they don’t understand that this Kingdom is already here.

Do not be confused with this Kingdom, Jesus said is already within us, with the after life. I’m not talking about the after life when I talk of the Kingdom. When it comes to the after life, I personally tend to hold all ‘doctrines’ about the after life loosely, because the only real descriptions we try to glean from the Bible about it, are hidden within parables that require ‘ears to hear’ and most people end up arguing over who really hears and who is still deaf. However, from what many Christian Universalists have come to agree upon is that God has his way of bringing all things into Christ so that balance (justice) can be obtained in the after life. How that plays out is somewhat of a mystery, but we do believe strongly in having faith in Christ.

The most often misunderstood belief among CU’s is that of hell, because we don’t believe in a literal fire and brimstone hell that tortures people forever. Over the many years of theological studies, countless theologians, and numerous debates, the interpretation of just what hell is or means is vague. But don’t let that cause you to fear for us, because we most certainly still believe that we reap what we sow. We don’t require a belief in hell to manipulate us into living a healthy and well balanced life of faith. We don’t believe in frightening people into choosing Jesus, in fact we are firm in our belief that he never intended such a thing either.

I have my own personal concept of what happens after we die and it is supported in scripture, but remember that I said the after life is vague in the bible so what I believe is really only for my own personal growth in Christ. How I view the after life has no bearing on what other people believe and my beliefs are not going to “send people to hell”.

Many Christian Universalists believe that God will purify all things through Christ. That means all things, life, animals, and people. Everything!

The book of Revelation is filled with metaphorical imagery that can seem frightening, but when we step back a bit to look at the big picture we see that this book is the Revelation of Jesus Christ. It is not the revelation of the “end times”. When we see it as a Revelation of Jesus we can see the bigger picture clearer and come to understand the metaphors for destruction, judgment, mercy, and reconciliation.

Many times people gasp in horror that we would say all people are reconciled to God, but don’t be confused. We do not think that this is some free ride for molesters, thieving pastors, or murderers to get into the ‘party’ with blood on their hands. Many of us believe that there is a process that takes place in the after life that brings us to the place of humility so we can receive his grace. Everything Christians believe about the after life is purely speculation since none of us has gone through it nor come back with any tangible evidence of it.

We believe that how we view God in this life, will manifest in how we treat others. Viewing God through the redemptive and finished work of the cross puts us all on equal footing and brings about humility. At any time a Christian thinks they’re somehow better than another person (or even other Christians) they have elevated themselves to a place of pride. There is no place for pride in Christ and therefore must be brought down to the foot of the cross. Jesus came to find every last and lost sheep. He leaves the ninety-nine to find the one, because his fold needs to be complete.

So before you spout off that Christian Universalists are from the devil and dragging people off to hell, maybe take some time to first understand what we believe and watch how we live out our lives in Christ.

It’s not a belief in hell that makes one a follower of Christ.

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Finding Grace in Sheol

November 14, 2011 By 1 Comment

With all the ongoing debate about the doctrine of hell, I’ve had to step back and re-examine this belief and what that belief does to our mental health, our emotions, and our spiritual growth. Regardless of what the popular crowd of Christianity says about what they believe, I am only responsible for what I believe…and what if they’re wrong?

Taking into consideration that in the Old Testament the word is actually sheol, which is simply the grave, then what does this mean? King David made his bed in sheol and God was with him. Jonah was in sheol and God heard his prayer and delivered him from that dark place. I’ve been in this kind of sheol before and He certainly lifted me up and put my feet upon the Rock.

I view this sheol as a place of torment, I should know… I’ve been there. It’s dark and frightening, but it most certainly is place where God still comes to us and lifts us out. His mercy endures forever.

This sheol is a place where we can find humility. Many have been brought low into sheol in order that they turn their eyes upward to see their day of salvation.

It seems to me that these many instances of sheol in the Old Testament is part of God’s design to bring us into greater depths of his grace. For it is in sheol that we realize we need his mercy and grace.

I believe this sheol is a valley of death where we find correction from what we think is the “right way” and discover that his rod and staff do indeed comfort us. The Great Shepherd leaves the ninety-nine to go find the one and when we are falling down into this sheol, his hook shaped staff is lowered down to bring us up into his warm embrace. Contrary to popular belief, the Great Shepherd does NOT break the legs of the sheep, nor does he condemn us…he saves us.

When I view sheol in this perspective, I am brought to the place where I understand the power that resides in all of our failures…the power to redeem. Without times of failure we would not understand redemption. Through all this we can sing praise to Him who sits on the throne. We can come to understand that all things really are in Christ and his ‘will’ most certainly will be done.

In the popular view of sheol, being a literal fiery torment, there is no restoration, mercy, or forgiveness. However, we know that King David and Jonah both received salvation from the Lord while they were in sheol. This perspective alleviates our mental anguish of ‘eternal torment’ and gives us the hope that in the darkest of valley’s he is still there. We can face the fact that we will suffer consequences in this life time, yet still reach out and grab the staff of our Great Shepherd, our Kinsman Redeemer.

The concept of what we will answer for in the after life is not only a continual debate, but an unproven one. Since I can not prove or disprove exactly what will happen in the after life (if there is one), then I will do the best I can to understand how sheol interprets into my every day life. While the popular crowd of Christians insist that sheol is an after life place of torment, they have no factual evidence of this and there is far too much wonder and enjoyment in this life to protect than to worry about what may or may not happen after we die. Their claims that you must believe in this place of eternal torment is a requirement in order to be a Christian is a fallacy. Scripture never indicates that we must believe in eternal torment in order to follow Christ. Following Christ is a narrow path indeed and one who desires to do so follows Him by faith, not under threat of fiery torture.

Remember that when someone insists that you believe ‘x,y,z doctrines’ in order to follow Christ, just remember that love does not insist on it’s own way.

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Hospitable Communication

November 11, 2011 By Leave a Comment

I’ve taken a day to re-examine my last post where I shared my thoughts about Serena’s vlog, “Ode to the Oddball“. In my article I stated, “I don’t think she is criticizing the conference necessarily, but she is opening the discussion for those who feel awkward in Christian circles.“

Serena made an additional point on twitter when she said to me,

“I would have talked about being an oddball at the grocery store if that was my last social function. :) ”

She was further clarifying that her perspective was not about Relevant, nor about Christian circles, but just, in general, in social settings.

However, for myself..a person who has experienced a lot of unpleasant issues within Christianity, her message spoke to me on levels that perhaps she didn’t not realize when she made her video.

Since Christian circles are the majority of circles I run in…then that is where my personal experience with feeling like an oddball resides. I have ventured out into fellowship with people of various spiritual paths and interestingly enough… I don’t feel like an oddball with them.

I had contemplated whether or not the real issue is just me. Am I somehow the one with the dysfunction? Why do I often feel like a fish out of water? So I examined myself much closer and discovered that I don’t feel that way in other types of groups.

So the question remains..is my dilemma about Christianity? Surely not all Christians give me that feeling of being out of sync. The dynamic of personalities is different with each group you are in. I can walk into a home of Hmong people and feel like an oddball. Is it the Hmong family’s fault or mine?

Social situations can vary quite often and I definitely think it’s a two way street. The idea of hospitality is a huge part of a Druid community as well as some Christian churches. A good host or hostess who values their spiritual principle of hospitality will go to great lengths to make sure you feel at home with their group. If you feel like an oddball, they would become an oddball with you. This is what I see the apostle Paul describing when he said, “I become all things to all people”.

I can’t judge a group for not being hospitable in this way, for not all groups have hospitality as a high priority. At the same time, we can’t expect them to be fake and we certainly wouldn’t want that.

I do feel that there is a rather large gap in this area of hospitality among many Christian groups. I’m not saying this to berate them, but rather to challenge us all to dig deeper into the soul and ask the Lord to deepen us as hospitable Christians who can make people feel at home, even if they are an oddball.

Serena said, “Put your big girl panties on” and I think that there is a time for advice like that, but I don’t feel that advice is a perfect fit for all of us at all times. Here’s where we run into the kind of dilemmas I (and many of my readers) have run into. When we are hurt, wounded, belittled, then told to “put our big girl panties on” may seem more like an insult than an encouragement. I would never suspect that Serena meant it that way. Not at all! But since we never know who is reading our blogs, or watching a video, then we don’t know how the message will be received.

In a situation where we are made to feel ‘less than’, belittled, rejected, snubbed, or otherwise, we most certainly can pull up our drawers and hightail it out of there. God doesn’t expect us to continue to be in groups where we are made to feel that way and told to simply get over it, while they continue to mistreat us. We have the freedom to leave unhealthy circles like that.

On the other hand, it might be an opportunity for us to look around and see if there are others in the group who might feel the same way you do. I mentioned in my previous article that sometimes it’s just a matter of reaching out and saying hello. It might also be that you are a unique individual (which I think we all are) but perhaps a group you are in doesn’t know how to respond to your kind of uniqueness. Maybe it’s all a matter of learning to be better communicators.

texting by lady_jess, on Pix-O-Sphere

{photo credit Lady Jess}

So lets just open this conversation and find out what your experiences are. How have you responded to a variety of ‘oddball’ situations and what were the results? Did you grow or help others grow with you? Comment below.. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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Serena Speaks Out

November 10, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Sometimes the blogosphere and Facebook can feel like high school. The cliques of folk who are steeped in their religious superstitions and battles over who has the ‘right’ doctrine makes me nauseous. These last few years I have wrestled with my beliefs, but my faith remains constant…I hope.

But when a raw and honest blogger like Serena opens up about how she felt like the odd ball at the Relevant Conference, my ears perked up. It takes guts to speak up like that about a conference where you’re one of the speakers.

I don’t think she is criticizing the conference necessarily, but she is opening the discussion for those who feel awkward in Christian circles.

{She’s a gal after my own heart.}

She says put your ‘big girl panties’ on.

Yes, there are those of us who don’t feel like we fit in. I think this is just a part of life. I posted a question on my Facebook wall a while ago and I simply asked if anyone else ever felt insecure. The comments filled up quickly!

After leaving organized Christianity, I was told on numerous occasions that being a Christian doesn’t mean we are “Lone Rangers”. Oh really? Are you sure about that? Because no matter how many Christian conferences or churches we go to, we battle with feeling out of place.

I was blessed at Relevant10 with my HSBA friends who included me to sit with them whenever I needed a seat. But I did notice Serena…she didn’t have the longest line at the book signing. I heard people say they didn’t even know who she was. But then again..another friend of mine said she never heard of Ann Voskamp either.

But do you know what else I noticed? Serena Woods and Ann Voskamp knew who I was. And that meant the world to me.

When someone like Serena says she felt like the odd ball, I sit here dumbfounded. I scratch my head and smack myself in the face a bit…how could SHE feel like an odd ball? Serena the book author, public speaker, and raw honest blogger? An odd ball? Naaaaa.

So what is it about a Christian community that leaves us feeling like we just don’t fit in? What is it that makes someone as special as Serena Woods feel like she is an odd ball?

I think her vlog says it all.

And maybe we need a reminder…to reach out and say hello…because saying hello might mean the world to someone.

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Practical Consequences

November 9, 2011 By Leave a Comment

This world has plenty of consequences to deal with as it is, than to push people into a fetal position with fear of afterlife-punishments. People have a difficult time with concepts about an afterlife that has never been scientifically proven to exist in the first place.

But do we really need to be in fear of fire torture, when we can clearly see that stealing is punishable by getting arrested? Not only that, but they disgrace their family, might appear in the newspaper, and isn’t all that enough to teach people? Why do we need to heap additional unproven ‘consequences’ on them?

I am a firm believer in ‘reap what you sow’, or as some call it, ‘What goes around, comes around’. I think this is a decent enough of a spiritual concept that has more validity and documented evidence than afterlife type consequences.

I don’t think it’s necessary to use superstitious stories of an invisible boogie man or any other such nonsense to be Christians. I believe in practical faith and that every day living by faith can be done with simple beliefs in the reap and sow concept. If we live by ‘love one another’, ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’, ‘with whatever measure you sow, that you will also reap’, then I believe we can do well.

If you need more than that to keep you on the straight and narrow, then you might want to consider getting a good therapist.

Filed Under: Organic Faith Tagged With: , , ,

It was Time to Say Goodbye

November 7, 2011 By 1 Comment

It was time.

I knew I had to say goodbye..for my own sanity..to the past, farewell.

I wrote a simple goodbye to my religious past and its community. I’m the only one who knows what it said. I folded it up into an origami heart and took it to the Samhain celebration on Sunday.

The words spoken at this Druid ritual really fed my soul. This time of year is a time of change and preparation for the dark winter ahead..like the time a caterpillar is in its cocoon…to rest and allow the change to take place.

It was time for me to say goodbye and I placed my letter in the fire as a symbol of purification and closure for what had plagued me for so long. I’m thankful for the good I learned along the way, for even in a religious abusive environment, Jesus still speaks, comforts, and guides. He still taught me what I needed to know for the time.

In my heart I sang a song..to the tune of an old youth camp song…

Religion behind me, my faith before me,

Religion behind me, my faith before me,

Religion behind me, my faith before me,

No turning back, no turning back.

Tears streamed down my cheeks.

It’s time to stop looking at the yesterdays and turn to face forward…in the direction that my ship is headed.

I take a deep breath and dust the dirt from my feet and celebrate with a communal drink  of apple juice with my friends.

A smile emerges on my face.

Goodbyes are never easy, but hellos are so joyous.

And today we’re packing….it’s a step of faith.

Filed Under: Healing Tagged With: , , ,
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